Exodus Bible Jokes — Plagues, Parting Seas, and Puns

Exodus Bible Jokes – Abby’s Hearth Bible Jokes Series – Clean, family-friendly humour inspired by the second book of the Bible.

The Book of Exodus is one of the most action-packed books in the Bible — a baby saved from a river, a bush that burns without burning up, ten plagues, a sea that splits in half, bread that falls from the sky, and a mountain that shakes with the voice of God. These clean, family-friendly jokes are inspired by the stories in Exodus and are perfect for Sunday school, family devotions, or anyone who enjoys reading some wholesome Christian humour.

👶 Baby Moses (Exodus 2)

Why was baby Moses so good at floating?
He started life in a basket case.

Pharaoh’s daughter went to the river for a bath.
She came home with a baby instead.

🔥 The Burning Bush (Exodus 3)

Why couldn’t Moses ignore the burning bush?
It was the hottest conversation he’d ever had.

God told Moses to take off his sandals.
It was the first recorded “shoes off, please.”

🐸 The Ten Plagues (Exodus 7–12)

Pharaoh kept saying, “Tomorrow.”
Turns out tomorrow is a terrible day to repent.

What was Egypt’s noisiest plague?
The frogs. They just wouldn’t stop croaking.

Pharaoh had a hard heart.
Unfortunately, that made life hard for everyone else too.

🌊 Crossing the Red Sea (Exodus 14)

How did Moses cross the Red Sea?
One step at a time.

The Israelites finally reached the other side.
Talk about taking the scenic route.

Pharaoh should have stopped chasing people.
Some shortcuts really don’t work out.

🍞 Manna in the Wilderness (Exodus 16)

The Israelites woke up and found manna on the ground.
Breakfast had already been delivered.

God invented daily meal planning.
The Israelites just had to remember not to hoard it.

🪨 Water from the Rock (Exodus 17)

Who was the best plumber in the Bible?
Moses. He got water out of a rock.

📜 Mount Sinai (Exodus 19–20)

Moses climbed Mount Sinai twice.
Now that’s getting your daily steps in. Go Fitness App!

God wrote the Ten Commandments;
the original tablets, long before electronics.

🐄 The Golden Calf (Exodus 32)

Moses was gone for forty days.
The people somehow decided a golden calf was Plan B.

Aaron’s explanation?
“We threw the gold into the fire… and out came this calf!”

The Book of Exodus reminds us that God delivers His people with unmistakable power — even when they doubted Him at nearly every turn. Along the way there were miracles, missteps, and yes, a few moments that make us smile when we read them today.

📖 Don’t miss the rest of the Abby’s Hearth Bible Jokes Series, including our Genesis Bible Jokes and Revelation Bible Jokes, plus our Numbers Bible Jokes, Jonah Bible Jokes, and Daniel Bible Jokes.

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